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Sorry for being shit lately. It’s all John’s fault. Anyway, the main TOS story is, of course, the Series VII menus. Lovely lovely lovely lovely. The main menus for each disc look excellent, with the options spread across four vidscreens, rather than just two. It gives the extra extras, IDW and the Fan Films a deservedly prominent position.

There does seem to be a hint of faff surrounding the episode menus. Say, for some bizarre reason, you really felt like watching Ouroboros. Now, the first thing to do in this situation is to seek professional help. But let’s forget about that for now and go back to this hypothetical situation. You want to watch Ouroboros, so you click “select episode”, then “Ouroboros”, then either the normal or Xtended version, then you have to click “play episode”, then you DIE of FAFFING AROUND.

Although, to be fair, there is no other way they could have done it. It’s just a consequence of having so many options and so much stuff on the disc, and I’d much rather have a bit of faff than no such options.

While we’re vaguely on the subject of the episode menus - interesting to note that “Previously…/Titles” is an option on the Nanarchy menu. All previous series have had the first chapter on the menu as the first scene post-titles. However, given that five episodes of VII do not start with the title sequence, I guess things have changed in this respect. We’ll have to wait for the chapter titles to be released before we know for sure, obviously.

We’ll let you try and figure out which extras correspond to which prop in the sleeping quarters for yourselves. I’m more interested in Ellard’s sneaky reference to the Easter Eggs, and the deliberate red-herrings. Well, from the looks of things, the bazookoid on the scanner table, the lobster, the emergency ammo and Caroline Carmen’s arm could be egg locations… but I’m willing to bet money that none of them are.

One thing this update has reinforced is the sheer size of the release. It’s going to take me a full day to view all the content, rather than the full afternoon that previous releases have occupied. I really can’t wait.

But anyway. Other news. A new series of Scrapheap Challenge starts tomorrow, 18th September, at 17:35 on Channel 4. Scrapheap is bloody great, but I never seem to catch it. I’ll make sure I make the effort this time round.

Also, Norman Lovett has signed up for Collectormania, which is being held in Mil-ton Keynes in a couple of weeks time. Possibly a good chance for those who missed out on his cut-short autograph session at DJ to get stuff signed. Maybe he’ll take the piss out of your hair, like he did with mine.

And finally, the Dwarf DVDs have been released to a bunch of cheese-eating surrender monkeys. Was the man who burned Joan of Arc simply wasting good matches?

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